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Aroldis Chapman’s witness issue and the Sopranos

On September 1st, Aroldis Chapman was suspended three games for throwing a pitch near the head of Mike Brosseau. Chapman immediately appealed the suspension, and we’ve been waiting three weeks for some news.

Now, Jon Heyman is reporting that the case will be delayed until 2021 due to the “availability of a witness.”

I have so many questions here. Who is the witness? (ballpark was empty.) Why is there even a witness involved? Why is this taking so long?

In terms of figuring out what actually happened, I think we can narrow this down to a couple of guys from the old neighborhood.

Junior Soprano

It’s entirely possible that Uncle June may have made this witness “disappear”. We know Uncle June is an avid baseball fan. He taught Tony how to play catch! We also see him at a local baseball game with Tony in season one. His love for the Yankees (especially Italian Yankees) is obvious. “You had a swing like Joe D!” he tells Tony that day.

Additionally, in a flashback to Tony’s childhood, Uncle June makes it obvious he’s a diehard fan. “You see that game last night?” he asks Tony. “Joe Pepitone, tree RBIs!!!”

Vito Spatafore

Vito is a construction tycoon who generally uses intimidation and force to get what he wants. We learn about his love for baseball in season five. While at the construction site for a no-work job, Vito talks about how he attended the 1998 World Series against Fin’s Padres. “Yanks in four. I was there.”

Vito even offers Fin tickets to a Yankees-Padres game, but Fin declines. We know Vito hates missing the national anthem. Could he have intimidated this witness?

Bobby Baccala

Bobby is a master intimidator. We saw this when he easily intimidated a union leader into going along with a family scheme in season four.  The real reason I put Bobby on here is  that Steve Schirripa is a huge Yankee fan in real life. He’s constantly posting pictures in Yankees gear, and he even attended Mickey Mantle Day as a kid.

Benny Fazio

“What’re you, a Met fan?!”

This classic line from Benny to Fin in season five gets me every time. Benny is utterly disgusted with the possibility that Fin could be a Met fan and not a Yankee fan. Love it. Did Benny scare the witness?

Disclaimer: This was entirely a spoof article and I am not insinuating that the Yankees are involved in any mob activity.