Before scoffing at the title of this essay think about how appropriate the title is. The entire team is battered and bruised much like the heroine of a Tyler Perry film. There have been a number of ups and downs to the season, and a strong amount of pomp and circumstance surrounding this season as well. There is a sagacious older figure, who is a crowd pleaser, like Madea, in Mariano Rivera. Then there is, of course, the controversial male lead, A-Rod, and the heroic male, Alfonso Soriano, who valiantly tries to save the heroine, or in this case the season. Oh, and do not forget about the cliches. As Kevin Costner taught everyone in “Bull Durham:” Cliches are your friend. Poor Joe Girardi has spoken in nothing but pat cliches about how he believes in this team, the Lyle Overbays and Jayson Nixes. Finally, lots of money gets made. Though not as much as a summer franchise like “Fast&Furious 7” or a superhero movie. Still, do not be fooled large sums of money are made. No denying that there have been many empty seats at the Stadium, but that simply means that the team has not made the exorbitant amount of money it made in years past; they still made money. “Insidious 2” did not make the money that the first one did, but it made enough during its opening weekend that the third installment was greenlit. “Good Mornting,” and “Good Afternoont.”
If 2014 is a sequel to this melodramatic and difficult to watch season-my apologies, but Tyler Perry flicks are just not my thing- then Yankee fans should go to www.ipetitions.com and get the front office to at least bring back an oldie but a goodie, old number Twenty-Seven. No, not Bobby Murcer or Luis Sojo. Raul Ibanez. Remember him? He of the clutch hits and home runs in the regular season and against the Orioles and Tigers in the postseason. Bring him back. Everyone realizes that for some bizarre reason the front office concluded this year that money does not grow on trees. Hence trees are simply a source of shade and aid in photosynthesis; they do not talk and give you prizes like the odd talking ticket oak in the Stub Hub commercials. However, if the Yankees want 2014 to not be an empty sequel, like the “Twilight” franchise then they need to go back to basics and start with a good script. People watch movies, theatre, and tv because they want to be entertained. It all starts with a good story, and to be honest no one cares about Travis Hafner or many of the other 99 cent store purchases the Yankees made this past year. The fans need protagonists that are easy to identify with like an Andy Pettitte or a Derek Jeter; players who maximize on the talents they have and manage to play above them because of their intensity and desire to win.
Perhaps they should have just admitted that they need to rebuild and taken a large step back in order to take many leaps forward. Remember last year how the Red Sox looked more like Pawtuckett? No one cares this year as they seem to be many analysts favorite to win it all this year. Of course luck has been on their side. How else to explain that Koji Uehara has not seemingly allowed a baserunner since May. Seriously, he looks like Mariano did in ’96 when Twins manager, Tom Kelly said he belonged in a higher league. Still, the fact remains there is little help on the way for New York. Yes, David Phelps may become a solid starter. Same with Vidal Nuno. Remember him? Likewise, Nova, may turn out to be the anchor of the staff for years to come, but they are handcuffed to CC Sabathia so they need him to perform. Oops, the studio just called for re-write and Sabathia is done for 2013, and who knows if he returns later in sequels. Even with all those maybes aligning they still need more pitching as 2013 has proven depth is necessary, especially when talking about pitching, or next season will be like “Madea gets a Job,” a straight to dvd release. Sure the Yankees will make their money off of it, but fewer far fans will care. “Hallelujer.”
If the Bombers follow the aforementioned model then they really would be following in the footsteps of the New York Giants. They look like they try and win every handful of seasons when they come together and make it work for a Super Bowl run, but more often than not they are a team of disappointment. -Sounds crazy, but in retrospect how big is Girardi’s not pulling AJ Burnett with the lead after five plus innings in October of 2010 against the Rangers. The mercurial nature of AJ that year left so many question marks in the rotation, and if they would have won that game that series would have been tied. Who knows how things might have played out. Instead Benji Molina gave the Rangers a lead with a clutch home run, and Texas never looked back. The Yankees could have possibly repeated, squeezing out as much important baseball as possible from a cast of characters that were mostly in or near their primes.
Instead the team is left clinging to Madea and little else. They are left looking for something to keep Tyler Perry Studios, er, the Yankees, swimming in money. Whether it is a sideshow like YES and their homer radio broadcast team of Sterling and Waldman, or venturing out to an animated series. Rumor has it a Madea cartoon series is on the horizon. Remember that the Yankees made headlines when they removed A-Rod from an animated film, “Henry and Me,” earlier this summer. All that is really left is for Hal Steinbrenner to show up on Oprah regularly. Think about that combination. “Heller!”
